why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
