You work out of a Hotel?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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