pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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