I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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