So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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