I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
