Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Randomize