a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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