i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
