It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
