idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
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