I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
