let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
