ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
