weddingsv make me drug and hornr
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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