That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
