If i come over, it means nothing
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Randomize