winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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