I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm experimenting with sincerity
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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