Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize
