he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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