i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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