yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
