when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize