Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize