She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I am naked and annoyed.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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