i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
