how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i already hear my dad disowning me
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
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