i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
