wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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