Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
