it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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