yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
