I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
