I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize
