Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
another moral hangover. fuck.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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