OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
