return my video game
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
