so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
