Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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