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I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
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