Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
