yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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