I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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