I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
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