You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
we're making bets on your personal life
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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