no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
