South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
