i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
