so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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